COBBER SEASON APPROACHING

STOP WHAT YOU ARE DOING!

Charles Bronson
Cobber’s Morning Herald
July 21, 2020

Cobber’s Morning Herald is now ON SIGHT!

COBBER SEASON APPROACHING,

FUCK WHATEVER YA BEEN HEARIN,

FUCK WHAT, FUCK WHATEVER YA BEEN WEARIN,

AUSTRALIA BOUT TO COME ALIVE AGAIN.

***

I am pleased to announce the launch of this new website, ‘Cobber’s Morning Herald,’ a new source for dinky di Australian news as interpreted by a ridgy didge kinda cunt (racist gamer). At some point in the future, I hope to have completely eliminated (politically), your need for the repulsive and traitorous journalists that you, the reader, have had to put up with for so long.

No longer will your news be full of gay shit, or written in a way that only entertains retarded boomers. This is news for the Australian man!

AND I SHOULD CLARIFY! When I say, ‘Australian man,’ I am not referring to any hyphenated ‘neo-Australians’. I am certainly not referring to our yellow skinned citizens, who have thus far primarily contributed enormous amounts of saliva into our indoors bins (particularly in food courts and/or airport lounges).

Disgusting gook spits (probably inside)

Nor do I refer to the vibrant and cultured african-Australian people, whose greatest contribution to this nation has fallen into the category of home invasions! (and machete attacks (in my opinion))

ABC:

“…Niggers…” – Gucci Mane (actual quote)

And I most certainly do not refer to my street shitting neighbours, Pravan and Guptil, who have acquired entry level programming jobs that might have been perfect for a young Australian nerd. Pravan and Guptil are happy to work for very cheap, because they are committing tax fraud (in my opinion), and as such the free market has determined that they are perfect candidates for the Australian tech industry.

Guptil has mastered the art of piecing together a delicious serving of spaghetti code, with ingredients drawn from various stackoverflow dot com threads

When I say Australian man, I refer to the same stock who settled this country and made it more than just a sunburnt patch of dirt with a big rock in the middle. I refer to the people who developed a unique social order and culture on this land mass. I refer to those who share a heritage with the men who braved drought so that Australia could become the working man’s paradise that it was.

I refer to White Australians.

Yo, based!

We will together strive to restore the greatness of the Australian nation and race, above all others. We will achieve air, land and sea superiority (in the Olympics). We will call sheilas fat online and tell seppos that they are faggots.

It’s cobber season bitch.

Stop letting stinky curries mine our barbaloot fruits

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